Sunday, November 2, 2014

looks like we made it, look how far we've come, my baby. we mighta took the long way, we knew we'd get there someday...

Well, friends, we have made it through chemo. 143 days of CHEMO. The last infusion was on Halloween. I had joked for a long time about showing up in costume as Walter White since I am bald, and could have easily borrowed my dad's old glasses to complete the look. Then ebola happened, and I decided it was a bad idea to go to a hospital wearing a hazmat suit.  Instead I went for plan B. WONDER WOMAN. No, I didn't wear tights. I just wore a tshirt and my usual sweat pants with a gold scarf. And boy howdy, did I feel like Wonder Woman when it was over.

I did my last 30 minutes on the treadmill in the cancer center gym. I did my 17th blood draw (for pre-chemo labs) and met with Freda the nurse practitioner. (Dr. O was out of town). I was approved for my LAST chemo, and I proudly marched into the infusion waiting room.

When they called my name, I was greeted by two nurses instead of one. Thom and Marsha. I've had Thom before, but Marsha was shadowing Thom. Turns out she is a breast cancer survivor, and decided to switch careers afterwards and become a chemo nurse. So cool to be able to talk to her on my last round about everything from being a survivor, to hair growth. Once the machine beeped indicating that the last of the Taxol had dripped through, I just could not stop smiling. It was joyous to be able to walk out of there knowing I was DONE with my 16 rounds. SIXTEEN ROUNDS. Also, I finally got to hang up my "NO MO' CHEMO" banner that my sweet friend, Jency, made me ages ago. I've been waiting so patiently for that banner, and I'm pretty sure I'm never taking it down.

The next part of this dance with cancer is a double mastectomy. I'm apprehensive about it, but everyone tells me that chemo is the hard part. We're going to biopsy some lymph nodes, and look more closely at the breast tissue that is being removed with a microscope for any errant cancer cells hiding out in there. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little bit scared about what they might find, but at the same time I am really, truly optimistic about it. I believe that the chemo has done it's job, and that they won't find any trace of cancer left. I believe that my body has had a pathological complete response to the 16 rounds of chemo I have gone through. I believe that I will not have a recurrence of cancer, and that my ovaries will come out of their "chemopause" and work just like they used to. I believe that Dr. O will tell me in 3 years that it's ok to try to have children. I believe that I will be a mother one day. And a grandmother. Please pray for me that all these things are true. Not only that, BELIEVE them to be true.

One last thing. I want to take a minute to thank all of my chemo nurses for taking care of me these past 5 months. Your calm demeanor, and cheerful attitude was so reassuring and appreciated, so THANK YOU to Carrie, Ellen, Sandy, Thom, Michelle, Kasey, Courtney, Colette, Ecrum, Lindsey, and Marsha. Y'all are my angels.

Love y'all. Please keep praying and vibing!

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