Friday, October 17, 2014

pink it was love at first sight, pink when I turn out the light, and pink gets me high as a kite, and I think everything is going to be all right no matter what we do tonight...

Hey y'all. Still doing pretty good, considering chemo, but I just haven't had the energy to write about it lately. I feel like I've gotten into a groove with the treatments, and there isn't really much to report right now other than the continued countdown. I suppose that is partially a blessing - chemo has become routine and mundane. Thank goodness it has been predictable rather than exciting. I am so ready for it to be over, though. Ready ready ready. Today was chemo #14 of 16. Ohmygoodness we are so close. Two more weeks. I think I can I think I can I think I can...

With fall hitting (sort of? It's currently 84 degrees in Richardson, Tx) I have been more aware of the chill in the air than I usually am when this time of year finally rolls around. I am ALWAYS cold. Please hair, grow back fast. I need that extra layer of insulation. Thank God, I live in Texas! I'm not sure I could bear an actual winter. It's not like you can wear a scarf on your head AND around your neck. That, my friends, is crazy talk.

This morning Connor and I met with the plastic surgeon the first time. Reconstruction is going to be kind of a big deal, involving many steps. Unfortunately I won't be getting my brand new perfect boobs immediately. First they are going to do the mastectomy and add "tissue expanders" to basically hang out in the place where my breast tissue used to be because radiation and implants don't play nicely together. If only I had some more fat on me (boo hoo... I know), he could take some tissue from my tummy or thighs to create boobs, and in that case I think we might be able to do it in one surgery? Not sure. Doesn't matter though because it isn't meant to be. I think the plan is to do some combination of implants and real tissue from my thighs, because real tissue helps the success rate of the reconstruction. Plus it lasts longer and looks more natural. Fun fact: the shelf life of an implant is only 10-12 years. After surgery, the next step is radiation, and we monitor how my skin holds up during that process. Then 6 months later we can talk about switching out the expanders for real implants, if the radiation didn't mess me up too much. Haha, "real" implants. Apparently this process can take up to two years. Dang.

So, the highlight of today was that I am now a model. I got to pose in a "studio" (modified exam room) with fancy lights wearing nothing but my shoes and "photo panties". At least at the plastic surgeon's office, they give you a robe to wear in the exam room, rather than a gown. It was like a spa day. Regular doctors take note: while the word "gown" may sound more fancy, the real thing is in fact, the opposite of fancy. Robes > gowns. Also, please consider offering mani/pedis.

Alright y'all. Please keep praying and good vibing. As we get closer to the end of chemo I am rejoicing on one hand, but getting nervous on the other. I like chemo because I know right now I am fighting this thing. Afterwards I am not so sure how I will feel. Pray for the cancer cells to be completely gone, and that I can walk in confidence after chemo and surgery knowing that it is true.

Love y'all,

Bonus time:

On Wednesdays we wear pink! My fabulous team at work surprised me with a dress up day. :)

These three missed the "official" photo due to having to actually work, but they made up for it by posing before they had to dash. :)

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